Archive for August, 2005

27
Aug

The Friends

Recently, this friend of mine (Kai Rin) met an accident.

He was riding on his bike, on the way back to UKM along Jalan Dengkil. That road is infamous for being winding with blind corners at almost every turn. What’s worse is that the road is narrow, very narrow. He got hit by a bus, and the wheels ran over both his feet, fracturing both. The injury wasn’t serious. But it was enough to take him away from classes for 6 weeks. Only a handful (maybe 2 handfuls) of friend knew about it and bothered to show their concerns.

The most imporatant question is: How did i caught wind of this unfornate event?

I overheard it during lunch in a cafe a few days after the event.

Now, i would never have known he was involved in an accident if not because i was in the restaurant at that time, sitting near to that table. So, while visiting him in Pantai Cheras, he mentioned that if he suddenly disappears off the face of earth, no one’s gonna notice. No one’s gonna miss him. And no one’s gonna give a hoot about it either.

What he said numbed me.

It occurs to me that as much as we like to think we are important in other people’s life, we really aren’t. In fact, we don’t even mean a thing.

We like to think we have friends who care and we like to think we are friends who care. Actually, we don’t.

Someone once said, we are nobody that happen to meet at the same cross road. After that, we move on with our pathetic lives, and couldn’t be more bothered with those that have crossed our paths.

“To hell with the guy [at the cross road], he’s a incompetant, self-absorbed nincompoop. I’m going on with my life, dude.”
Feel free to replace [at the cross road] with [who was my coursemate in uni], [who was my roommate], [who was my best buddy], [who was a good friend from school]……

That’s the friends we have.

That’s the friend we are.

As far as i am concerned, i am blessed to have friends who really care. Who would notice and ask if i am to face the slightest obstacle in my life. I’m not sure if i can be that kind of friend to them. But you can be sure i’ll try.

So, are you a friend… or are you a ‘friend’?

Yours Sincerely,
the FRiend

22
Aug

The Old Man

The old man.

Is 66 year old.

Is retired.

Is chatting animatedly with other old men at the nearby kopitiam.
__________

From afar (actually not so far away), i observed this old man. Happily chatting away with other men of his age. I was at the grocery, waiting for my father. This old man, with his greying hair seem young compared to others with hair of white. I could hear him talking about his sons and daughter. How proud he is with his daughter passing her Grade 8 piano examination and one of his son graduating from college soon. I was a little put off by his “bragginess”. And he complained how his son sometimes talks to him rudely or never seem to appreciate his little gestures he does that show that he cares.

I felt like ‘termakan cili’ (siapa makan cili rasa pedas) hearing what he said. It reminded me of a recent incident.

I hanged my clothes after taking them out of the washing machine. After the clothes had dried, my father took the clothes back in to the house before the humid weather wets the clothes during the evening. I shouted at him. Telling him not to touch my clothes. Just let it be. Obviously, he was disappointed at my behavior.

However rude i seem to be, I just didn’t want him to be too nice to me. I just couldn’t tell him that i don’t want him to pamper me. I don’t need a father that does my chores or iron my shirts. I don’t need him to push the food closer to me during dinner. I don’t need him to say “please” whenever he has needs of me.

Many a times, i always think that my father simply don’t understand a particular situation. Then i start to argue with him, thinking that i am definitely correct. Turns out i am correct, but my father is way more accurate. If you ask me, i’ll tell you my father is the wisest man i’ve known.

Do all these mean i respect him less? No. It means i just want him to relax a little bit and let me be the one to show my concerns.

Tomorrow, the earth may crumble and the sky may fall. But he’ll still be my father. He doesn’t have to ask for my respect. He doesn’t have to earn my respect. He doesn’t need to…simply because he is my father.
__________

The old man.

Is leaving and walking towards me.

Is my father.

Yours Sincerely,
the SOn.

20
Aug

The School Break

Yeah…yeah… i know the last university break i had ended 2 months ago. But i’m still going to write about it.

This particular holiday was especially… how should i put it in words:… meaningful, to me. (Despite the fact that i was mostly rotting away at home.) By the time lectures began, i was feeling sorrow(”melancholic” sounds more suitable) as if i had just said good bye to a precious friend.

During the break, i’ve been doing a bit of travelling. I went to Taiping to visit my grandma & and grandpa. Everytime i see them, i just couldn’t help feeling calm and also sad sometimes. You know that they would not be around for much longer, but i just can’t seem to visit them often enough. I’m so afraid that one day i would be so caught up with my own life that i wouldn’t remember them anymore.

Back to KL, I’ve been mamaking with a bunch of primary school friends. People change, and people don’t change. Most of them (or “us”, for that matter) looks like what we used to be. And we still talk and behave the way we are. The only difference? We are are no longer cute, but gorgeous and handsome, Haha. As we were chit-chatting i realised that soon, everyone would be graduating soon. In fact, some had already found work. And one had begun working in Singapore. Not that most of us keep in touch all the time, but knowing that once we start working(and ‘pak toh’) no one will really bother with mamaking anymore.

Then… people Change.

I miss the people. I miss the innocence of childhood friends. I just afraid that one day, when all of us change, will we still be friends as we used to?

Yours Sincerely,
the FRiend.